The Me2festo: Gay Marriage

Nov 5, 2008

In a perfect world, children should grow up in a stable household with upstanding parental role models. A mother and father are bound together in faithful matrimony, defining and contrasting masculine and feminine roles. The happy family paradigm will imprint upon them, so that they may continue the cycle when they reach adulthood. From this base the citizen stands the best chance of becoming a productive member of society.

Now, taking the opposite to its impossible extreme, everyone forms a gay pair, and no children are created without medical intervention or disconnected relationship (i.e. sperm donor). In this case, humanity would become extinct. Don’t get me wrong, I already think there are far too many people in the world as it is, and that is a topic for another time. But I have simply defined two diametrically opposed ends of a spectrum for illustrative purposes. Given the choice of these two options, which path is best taken? I would argue the former.

The real world is uncooperative indeed. Are there broken homes with a mother and father rife with abuse and negativity? Yes. Are there happy homes where gays or lesbians raise well adjusted kids? Yes. A target is something to aim for, knowing that one will likely deviate from, but hopefully at least get close to. Thus, what do I want that target to be? The ideal definition of the family. As such, granting full legal marriage status to any two willing warm bodies obfuscates that objective.

Let me underscore that I believe in personal freedom and responsibility. Gays can be gays, though preferably not of the “in your face” pride parade variety. If two people love each other, hooray. I am not out to round up homosexuals and put them in camps. What I want is for society to be able to point and say “we should head that way,” while at the same time being permissive of those who stray off course.

The label of “marriage” is not a private issue but a public endowment. Homosexual relationships should be able to make legal arrangements similar to those enjoyed by heterosexual couples, such as right of survivorship and community property. However, the recognition of a legal marriage, even if it has little more than symbolic significance, must remain in the domain of tradition.

© 2008